On Wednesday, April 22, all major social media sites will go offline for 24 hours to recognize Earth Day 2015. Executives at Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube, Pinterest, Tumblr, Snapchat and Reddit were all present at a top-secret meeting Monday, March 30 where ideas were passed around on how to properly recognize this year’s Earth Day. After hours and hours of heated debate, it was decided that they would all shut down operations for the day.
Earth Day was conceived in 1970 and marks the anniversary of what many consider to be the modern environmental movement. That movement made possible the passage of groundbreaking environmental laws including the Clean Air Act, Clean Water Act, and Endangered Species Act and many more. The Earth Day Network (EDN) partners with over 22,000 organizations in 192 countries to continue and grow the environmental movement. Each year, more than 1 billion people participate in Earth Day activities around the world.
The social media powerhouses came up with a wide range of Earth Day ideas. One participant thought all major company buildings should be raised 10 feet off the ground, allowing for grass and flowers to be planted underneath. Due to the lack of sunlight, many thought it was not the best solution. Another Earth Day idea was to have all employees write a goal for the future environment on a piece of a paper, tie the papers to balloons and let them go at a pre-determined time. While beautiful, most agreed that it would be counterproductive.
Eventually, all of the meeting members decided to simply shut down their sites. This means that billions of users will not be able to access any of their favorite sites. While the act will reduce the emission of a large amount of greenhouse gasses, there will be grave consequences. Experts have predicted that hundreds of people will lose their jobs, millions of teenage girls will lose their minds, and thousands of people will pass away from boredom-related deaths. Despite these risks, the social media executives are going forward with their plan.
The social media blackout will start at 12 a.m. on Wednesday, April 22 and last until 11:59 p.m. During the outage, the social media companies urge everyone to remain calm and refrain from calling emergency services to complain. More information can be found on www.YOLOEarthDay.com.
Editor’s Note: All of the above is false. Happy April Fool’s Day, from Traffic Jams!
